Im not the brightest crayon in the box
Everyone says Im dumber than a bag of rocks
I barely even know how to put on my own pants
But Im a genius in France (yeah), genius in France, genius in France
Hoom chaka laka
Hoom chaka laka
Hoom chaka
I may not be the sharpest hunk of cheese
I got a negative number on my SATs
Im not good looking and I dont know how to dance
But nevertheless and in spite of the evidence I am still widely considered to be
A genius in France, a genius in France, a genius in France
People say Im a geek, a moronic little freak
An annoying pipsqueak with an unfortunate physique
If I was any dumber, theyd have to water me twice a week
But when the Mademoiselles see me, they all swoon and shriek
They dig my mystique, they say Im cest magnifique
When Im in Par-ee, Im the chic-est of the chic
They love my body odor and my bad toupee
They love my stripey shirt and my stupid beret
And when Im sipping on a Perrier
In some cafe town in St. Tropez
Its hard to keep the fans at bay
They say, "Sign my poodle, sil vous plait"
"Sign my poodle, sil vous plait"
Hemenene humenene
himenene homenene
Poodle... poodle...
Folks in my hometown think Im a fool
Got too much chlorine in my gene pool
A few peas short of a casserole
A few buttons missing on my remote control
A few fries short of a happy meal
I couldnt pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel
Instructions on the heel
Instructions on the heel
But when Im in Provence, I get free croissants
Yeah, Im the guy every French lady wants
And if you ask em why, youre bound to get this response
(Hes a genius in France! Genius in France!)
Thats right
(Hes a genius in France, genius in France)
You know it
(Hes a genius in France, genius in France, genius in France)
Im not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree
But the folks in France, they dont seem to agree
They say, "Bonjour, Monsieur would you take ze picture with me?"
I say, "Oui, oui"
Thats right, I say, "Oui, oui"
"Oui, oui"
He says, "Oui, oui"
Im dumber than a box of hair
But those Frenchies dont seem to care
Dont know why, mon frere
But they love me there
Im a genius in France
Yeah, Im a genius in France
Gonna make a big splash when I show up in Cannes
Gonna make those Frenchies scream
"You ze man! You ze man! You ze man!"
Like a fine Renoir (waa), Ive got that je me cest quoi (quoi!)
Like a fine Renoir (ooh la la), Ive got that je me cest ...
Quoi quoi quoi quoi quoi, oo-we-oo
Quoi quoi quoi quoi quoi, oo-we-oo
Bow diddy bow di bow di bow bow diddy
Bow diddy bow di bow di bow bow diddy
Bow
Im a taco short of a combo plate
But by some twist of fate, all the Frogs think Im great
Oh, the men all faint and the women scream
They like me more than heavy cream
When Im in Versailles, Im a popular guy
My oh my, Im as French as apple pie (apple pie)
They think Im awful witty, a riot and a half
When I tell a stupid joke, they laugh(haw haw haw haw haw)
And laugh (haw haw haw haw haw haw)
People in France have lots of attitude
Theyre snotty and rude, they like disgusting food
But when they see me, they just come unglued
They think that I am one happening dude
Bowm ba ba bowm ba bowm ba bowm
Im about as sharp as a bowling ball
But they like me better than Charles de Gaulle
Entre nous, its very true
The room temperatures higher than my IQ
But they love me more than Gerard Depardieu
How did this happen; I dont have a clue
Well, Im not the quickest tractor on the farm
I dont have any skills or grace or charm
And most people look at me like Im all covered with ants
But Im a genius in France (yeah), genius in France, genius in France
And Im never goin back, Im never goin back
Im never never never never goin back home again
Im tearin up my return flight ticket
Gonna tell the folks back here where they can stick it
Cause Im never goin back
Im never goin back
Im never goin back
The girls back home never gave me a chance
But I sho nuff got them Frogs in some kinda trance
And Im aware that its a most improbable circumstance
But "Great Googily Moogily", Im a genius in France
Every Frenchie that I meet
Just cant wait to kiss my feet
Get in line, pucker up! Tout Suite!
Bowm diddy bowm diddy bowm diddy
Im gettin even more famous by the hour
Im stuffed with pastries and drunk with power
Now theyre puttin up my statue by the Eiffel Tower
A little more to the left, boys, a little more to the left
A little more to the left, boys, a little more to the left
Im the biggest dork there is alive
My mom picked out my clothes for me till I was 35
And I forgot to mention
Im not even welcome at the Star Trek convention
But the Frenchies think
That my poop dont stink
Im a genius in France
Say, would you pass the Grey Poupon?
Merci beaucoup
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